The Little Things

Being in a new country has meant many big changes. A new job, picking up more of a new language, living alone for the first time, being away from family, friends and church for more than two weeks; these are just a few of the major changes I've been adjusting to. So far, I think I'm doing well with that, but there are times when the big just seems so big, so different.

I'm a week into Natsu Yasumi (summer vacation) and some of the big things were getting me down with no work to distract me and having to save money along with that. But then the little things started popping up.

A friend sent me some new music (including the new Hillsong United cd which gave me a bit of a spiritual recharge), I received a package that included my favorite cereal from my family, I was able to text a new friend for translation help and she came through, I cooked some food with a Japanese twist I'd picked up eating school lunches, and, today, I went to an elementary school volleyball tournament.

About a month before the end of term volleyball practice began at Yasuzuka Shogakko (Elementary School), the school I taught at every Tuesday. I asked to watch one day and the coach invited me on the court to help and play. After that they said I could go to practice every Tuesday and so I did. The team is small (only 7 memebers, 6 of whom are 6th graders and one 3rd grader) but they work hard and I've been really impressed with them. I've also been impressed with their families. The parents show up and help out at practices and really support their girls.

Although the 1st term has ended the coaches told me about the tournament and so I exchanged a few texts (in Japanese, hence the need for translation help) with "Momo's Mama" and went to the tournament. The parents and the girls were so sweet! They seemed happy that I was there and tried to chat with me during breaks. When there was a break for lunch, the girls talked to me and we worked on my Japanese and their English (well, a little), then Nozomi gave me a One Piece cell phone charm.

It was a small thing and she had a couple extras from a trip to Round One in Utsunomiya, but because I like One Piece she gave it to me. That small gesture made my day. It reminded me why I'm enjoying my time here and made getting up early and finding my way to Kanuma completely worth it.

Hawkeye Mihawk fits nicely with my Ace screen cover. 

It is completely corny but it really is the little things that make the days good.

'Nuff Said,
Crysania

A Dose of Humility

Sorry about not posting. I really do want to keep this up but i've been sick lately and just haven't had the energy.

At the beginning of the day I was worried most about the fact that I had to open at my new job and didn't know where the light switch was, but by the end of the day (now) I'm comtemplating something so much bigger; much bigger than me.

I realized that so many moments led to the one that happened a few hours ago. I was sitting on a couch in a stranger's house discussing something that will change my family, really change us.

It hit me that we were really going to finally discuss the giant elephant living in my house for months and all I could think about was how I needed to be open and have the right mindset. So, as I often do, I went looking for the right song ... and the one that hit me truly surprised me.

"Everything I once held dear, I count it all as loss
Lead me the the cross, where Your love poured out
Bring me to my knees Lord I lay me down"

I really wasn't expecting to find so much comfort in these words but once I listened to the song (out of many I searched through) it stuck; I couldn't get the words out of my head.

And when I thought about it, that's what I needed. I didn't need a song about finding strength or being stronger ... I needed to be humbled and open because I don't know what's going to happen now. Things are going to be taking a sharp turn in my famiy and it's all happening very fast, but that's why I need to stop and look for God's will in this situation.

I don't know how this will all work out, and it scares me. It scares me that I've enabled the situation and, in turn, added to the hurt dealing with this is going to cause ... but that's where my faith keeps me going. That's why a song I hadn't heard in a few months stopped me dead in my tracks.

I'm not the best Christian. I'm hypocritical and have a bad mouth and can be bitter and I don't really like people in general and I talk myself out of sharing my faith ... I have lots of areas to improve ... but God still loves me ... He still loves my family and if I take a step back and allow myself to be led I think things will turn out eventually. Egos will have to be broken and the road will be hard, but I can do this because, no matter what, I'm not alone.

I know I rambled more than usual today but I just needed to get these thoughts out. As you can tell, I had a rough day and my family is going to have do something none of us really want to but we need to do. It's scary and I needed to get my thoughts out.

I promise not all my entries will be so "preachy" but I felt I really had to write a blog now (yeah, at 2 am.).

'Nuff Said,
Crysania